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Hello Voices, I met my ex in August 2008(I was in my first year) and he was in his 2nd year. I was 18 and It was love at first sight. He respected me so much that even when his friends put silly ideas in his head to have sex with me before another person does, he told them that he isn't with me because he wants sex but because he loves me. The relationship blossomed and I knew the meaning of love through his actions.

In June 2009, ASSU went on strike and we all had to go home. In August, on my way home from the saloon, a guy in a car stopped me. We got talking and he requested for my number and I refused and walked away. Few days later I met him again close to my house. I never knew he lived on my street. He begged for my number and said he just wanted to be a friend. So I gave him my number. My boyfriend started complaining that I was becoming cold on him and I assured him everything was fine. The new guy began calling me and inviting me to his place. So I went to visit him. We talked at length and he asked if I was in a Relationship and I said No(I regret that every day). And he said he would want to date me. I told him I wasn't interested but that we could be friends. My relationship began to suffer. My bf called my sis to ask me if he had done anything wrong. My sis asked me and I told her everything. She advised me never to leave my boyfriend for a random guy.

The new guy kept pestering me and I gave in. I didn't know how to break the news to my boyfriend. So I sent him a text that it was over between us. He called and begged, crying on different occasions. My sis begged me. But I didn't listen. Naivety and immaturity took a hold on me.The strike was called off in 02 October and the new guy dropped me at school.
My ex boyfriends next door neighbour was my course mate. She begged me severally to come and see him. That he is no longer himself and that he cries everyday but I didn't know how to face him.The new guy kept talking about sex and I told him I wasn't going to have sex.

In Feb 2010, I went to see him and he was playing musical in  loud manner. We kissed and before I knew it he was going for my pants. I screamed but he covered my mouth. He forcefully took my virginity away. Later he was pleading. I  quickly ran home and cried.

Meanwhile my ex was still coming around to check up on me. We became good friends. I wanted to tell him everything and that I wanted to come back but I did not know if he would forgive me. I never knew he was still in love with me. He kept coming until he graduated.The new guy ended up to be a liar, cheat and an abuser. In my final year(2011), I called off the relationship. I still kept talking with my ex. Last year February, I travelled to Lagos and I called him. He said he would call me back but never did. I came back to portharcout and barely few weeks after that, he called me that he was in PH and wants to see me. And I told him I was busy. I wanted to pay him back for what he did to me when I went to Lagos. And then I called him sometime in Aug last year and he said he just arrived London for his MSc. We started talking again and one day he asked me what he really did to warrant the breakup text he got from me. He also said all through the time he was coming to see me, he was still feeling we would get back and I told him that was exactly what I wanted but I didn't know if he will forgive me. And just few days ago I got jealous that I wasn't in his mutual friend list. So I called to ask him why he hates me so much. He became furious and told me that we are just friends except fate decides otherwise. The truth is after I called off the relationship with the random guy, I have been deliberately single since.

Please, I love my ex so much. I know he still loves me too. How do I repair everything? How do I get my relationship with him back. I feel it deep down that we are meant for each other. I feel it everyday. I need advice.

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Hi Voices,  I am a guy of 25yrs. I am having a problem of quick ejaculation during sex or when engage in long romance but have went to the hospital and did urine and blood test but all the results prove I am healthy and nothing is wrong with me.

The doctor told me I am too excited during sex and dat makes me to release fast and advice me to eat more fruits, engage in exercise nd also use original CD Which I am trying but still no changes.  So that's why I brought the  issues here so more experienced people and probably doctors can also help.

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Hello Voices, I am a 23yrs old girl in my 7th year of relationship. The problem now is how to introduce the guy to my mum. My mum and I are not that close,  we don't usually share my experience with her because she believes so much in education.
An incident happened last year when my mum came back from a wedding ceremony,she ask if I know the guy, was very surprised which I told her no. The following day, she asked the same question again, I told her no and I asked her why she's asking . She told me one of my uncle from her side got married to my bf sister and  they are now separated. So because of that she doesn't want me to have  anything to do with the guy so that his family won't revenge on me. What should I do? Please I need your advice.

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Hello Voices,
I'm dating two guys. Met one ending of February this year. He hardly calls me, I do all the calling. He only calls me when I flash him, always claiming to be busy. He doesn't care about how I feed, he doesn't give me money at all, only to his family members. He only calls me when he wants to have sex and after that he won't call again until weeks after. I want to know, is been busy a good excuse for not checking up on your girlfriend?

The only good part about is he's not a womanizer, even though he  cheats (all men cheat. He's not the discussion type, he doesn't play with me when I visit him.

About the second boyfriend, he's just the opposite of the first one, but a womaniser. He calls other girls in my presence, but I just feel comfortable being around him. As for money, I've never asked. Met him in May. 

The issue now is I want to drop one and stay with one. Should I keep the first one that doesn't care and doesn't womanizer or the second one who cares but is a womaniser?

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Hello Voices, I am 24 and just graduated. Presently dating a guy I met in school who's currently serving.
Now he wants to meet my parents to make his intentions known even if he still wants to continue with his Masters degree.
Settling down will take him 3-4 years from now. According to him he wants to get close to my family because I'm close to his already. But the issue here is my dad doesn't like the 'dating' stuff because the guy can disappoint after waiting for him. He always calls girls foolish for waiting for a particular guy. But my guy is insisting on the introduction, that my dad might see nothing wrong with it. What should I do?

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The way some guys act clearly indicate that they will end up as chronic headache for their wives in the nearest future if care is not taken. 

I can't really blame guys who are involved in the act of humiliating ladies in public and online because these ladies in question must have torment their heart but going to the extent of destroying their intrinsic values is the major concern here. 

Therefore let's take a look at signs that indicate a guy will become an irresponsible husband.

1. Extremely stingy

Some guys are so stingy to the extent that they can't call their girlfriends for just 1minute in a day. The only time they call for long period is during free night calls or bonus awarded from telecom providers. If they call for 30secs, they will hang up and later explain through whatsapp/BBM that it was network failure. 

2. Highly promiscuous 

This issue is common to perverts who has never zipped up for once in their life by chasing every tom and harry in skirt. These are the kinds that will eventually become sugar daddy, chasing ladies who are young enough to be their daughter in future. 

3. Very lazy

Some guys are so idle to the extent that they have no goal, vision and purpose in life. They are just too lazy to seize opportunities around them as they are only seen in betting shops like nairabet, etc. to make money. 

4. Ridicule ladies 

I hate when a guy beat or disgrace his girlfriend in public just because she hangs out with a guy. I consider this as a dysfunctional act because a man in making will not stoop so low to involve himself in this thrash. Meanwhile on nairaland some consider all ladies as whores of which we still have the rare and good ones like mhizkel, prettythicksme, redgem, aminat508, midehi, adeh39 and others. 

5. Habit of alcoholism and smoking 

For a guy that consume too much alcohol and smoke probably in the bid to control his anger is not a man. Such guys cannot become responsible husbands to their wives because they can use children's school fee and other budgetary money to drink and smoke. 

6. Wrong lifestyle 

Some guys rock and roll with the wrong peer groups who have influence them to have shameful lifestyles like yahoo yahoo occupation, rape gangs and area touts. 

7. Careless attitude 

The way some guys behave can be likened to a voracious animal. They dump and change ladies like sanitary pads as they care less about their emotion by suggesting abortion for any sex journey that becomes foetus. 

8. Poor financial planning 

Some guys blow money like trumpet without thinking about future investment. They spend their money on vague things like phones, prostitutes, etc. Such guys will eventually become an irresponsible husband.

Written by Emmanuel.

Hello Voices,
I'm 21 and in a happy relationship with Mr perfect. Though people says that there is no Mr perfect, but trust me with God anything is possible. We were friends for 2 years before we started dating 10 months ago. He loves God so much and our relationship has been sex free. This makes me love him more. I prayed to have someone who doesn't believe in sex before marriage, and God answered my prayer. I'm doing a bachelor in journalism to end next year.
I live with my mum as my parents got divorced.

My mum always says that she wants me to get my masters degree, that I have to use the opportunity now because she won't live forever. I agreed with her but my boyfriend is now telling me that as soon as I graduate, we should get married. He's just waiting for me to finish next year and doesn't want to don't want to sin(sex) and because he is human, he has feelings. He doesn't seem happy with what my mum and I want. Now, he has told me to forget about the Masters whether I like it or not because he is the one to decide when we should get married. He also told me that I can have my masters when I get married. What should I do?

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Hello voices, I am 26, and the guy I  am dating is 26 too. We love each other  so much that we don't keep secret from each other. We do things together. We are just like brother nd sister
He has told his dad about me and also concerning the age too but I have not told my parents. It's only my friends that knows about it.

I'm so concerned about the age. I know age is just a Number. I'm scared what will happen if I tell my parents that we are age mates, I don't know if they will agree to it.

I'm skeptical if getting married to him will cause any trouble in future because we are planning to get married early next year.

I need your advice please.

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Hello Voices, I am a 25yrs old lady, I broke up from my 3yrs relationship few months ago nd it was a tough one. He used to be my best friend before we started dating and along the line he stopped taking me serious, u know those things that a boyfriend will normally do to impress his girlfriend he stopped doing that because he feels i am going no where. The relationship was more like a brother and sister relationship which was not cool for me at all.

After the breakup I was out in the market but not searching, wanted a break from a whole 3yrs of my life wasted but I hate been alone a lot, then I met another guy after 3 to 4 months.  He is everything I wanted, and I like him a lot  but he also just survived a horrible relationship that was worse than mine and the problem is that sometimes it gets to him. He has been with his ex for 5 to 6yrs and they started up on a good note but along the line the relationship broke so he believes it may happen to our relationship.  So every little thing triggers him to say something hurtful comments like

''this is the same thing that happened before, we should maybe rethink this situation because I don't want to go through this again"

How can a person say such things to someone you are already involve with. And the relationship is almost 3 months old.  Please, advice me on what to do  because I am confused and his past is affecting my relationship, and I like him soooooo much.

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‎Hello Voices, Nice work you are doing here. I will like you to post this my life story and get advice from you as well as your fans.

I Am a 25year old lady. I Am in a dilemma with three guys(not dating all of them before you all start judging me). I met my boyfriend(A) 7years ago and he is a wonderful guy but the problem is that he is a school certificate holder and I have been encouraging him to study more but it's like he is not ready for that. The problem with him now is that he is battling with low self esteem and insecurity. His English sucks and sometimes I can't proudly presents him as my guy.

There is this other one(B) ‎, he is based abroad and he knows about my relationship and loves me so much. He is older than me and he is mature with the way he handles things but I am scared because of all the stories we hear about all these abroad guys. He is planning to come home to do the normal rites but if that is if I give him the go ahead and I don't think I can do that because there is age difference.

I met this other guy(C) some months ago. He is the outspoken guy and from all indications, I know he loves me but his dream is to build a house before getting married. I Am not desperate to get married at all because I have dreams I also want to accomplish before settling down. I Am the type of girl that don't like to put her burden on people. The problem now is guy(A) is planning to get me a promise ring so that guys can see i am engaged while I  am planning to break up with him because I want to give myself some space from guys and my parents did not approve him.

I Am just confused  and everything is kind of complicated. I don't even know if this story makes any sense(insults are allowed).

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Hello voices, I am a lady of 28 years old, when I was 18, I had a relationship with a guy that was a couple of years older  but I was really naive and somehow I had sex with him and I was pregnant. When I found out I was scared and I told a friend about it and she gave me something to use. The drugs wasn't good for my system so I fainted and that was how my mom found me and in panic she called our pastor because my dad was not home that day and he took me to d hospital.
So after d doctor revived me  I was discharged  but on my way home I started bleeding so in short I had to do DnC. Now I am dating a guy whose elder brother used to be friends with our pastor and by friends I mean very good friends. So, I am scared that the pastor might have told him or the pastor's wife might have told the brother's wife and I really love the guy and we are hoping to build a life together so I don't know if I should tell him about d abortion or just keep mute and hope his brother and the wife knows nothing about it.
I have asked God for forgiveness but I feel guilty whenever he tells me to go with him to his brother's house so much that i am always uncomfortable there and the brother's wife is already asking him that what am I to him. I need advice from matured minds only please.

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I'm a single mother 24rs old, I met a guy on Facebook exactly 3yrs now, we have been talking but sometimes we have issues and stay away for months and get back together I'm deeply in love with this guy and he's in love with me, but all the while we haven't met because he's outside the country. I can tell he's not married over there don't have a kid.

Today, he confirmed his ticket he's coming soon and the plan is to go see my people and take me to his people, suddenly he asked me if I have ever slept with anyone for the whole 3yrs we have been dating I just decided to tell him the truth . I told him I had sex with someone November last year and it was just a fling and to be honest I have been keeping myself for him, but that was a mistake. And that was it till now I never tried that again, he just got angry now he broke up with me called me names blocked me on all social media. I changed number to add him up again he hasn't un-block me now. I have been begging him all day. He said he's not coming no more he will cancel the ticket. We can just be friends. I love him so so much please.
I need advice what can I do to win him back I know he's heart broken. Was I wrong in telling him or I did the right thing . Please, its urgent I  am loosing my mind. I can't do without him I know people will say I  am in love with someone I've never met yes its very true it happens.

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